your love is a joke.

I wish that you could only understand how much it hurts.
You don't cause the pain, love, you heal it.
You heal me.
As much as I need to breathe.
And I don't need anything else.
Just you.
But now I'm starting to realize that it's not only about me
and my pain.
How selfish have I been?
Cut.
I am turning my self around.
.. too late for that, huh?
Well, losing you is something I cannot handle.
I will fight for you, until you end me.
And in case you have not noticed, you have the power
to leave me broken beyond repair.
Bleed.
I will not move, I will not breathe.
And when it is over..
I will not have a single word to speak.

finding the words.

I’m a wreck and I know it,
And I tend to show it every chance that I get.
Butterflies in the skies, they just fly on by.
Yeah, they’re making me sick.
They don’t flutter about, I’d do without.
All they do is kick.

Mean it truly,
Sincere heart.
Why do you do this to me?
Tear me apart.

It’s my fault and I know it,
And I tend to blow it, no thanks to you.
Its like you sit and you watch me,
You poke and you taunt me, it’s all that you do.
And I’m not fighting that no, not at all.
Just want to be something, a name you call.
The lips you taste just to fall, madly in love.

let's slit our wrists and burn down something beautiful

There's a part of me that would rather fade away than be alone,
and the rest of me already knows that I am nothing without you.
Forgive me for falling so deeply, too fast,
but happiness is a concept that I have failed to grasp, up until you saved me.
Because I have stared into my own eyes,
only to see good intentions masking the pain.
So, tell me, what can you see that is worth looking for again?

I love you more.

Breathing does not come easily when I lie awake at night
knowing all I've dreamed to be is held in your arms,
so tight that it feels like forever truly exists.


Because your words have intentions that tempt me to believe
that love has a purpose, other than to deceive those ignorant enough to fall.


Show me, beyond a reasonable doubt, 
that there is meaning to the phrases you utter so sweetly
because you've got me where you want me,
and you're welcome to keep me.

- Afraid to close my eyes.

To Hell with demons,
there's a different type of monster plaguing my past.
He waits until I'm content and then resurrects my pain,
lurking in the shadows; awaiting a chance to strike again.

This evil being finds me in the darkness; my most vulnerable state,
to take advantage of me instead of facing his own mistakes.
Monster, you think I have not noticed your sins?
Drowning the sorrows of spoiling my innocence.

I wish I had the courage to confront you, but I am much too weak,
and in your presence I dare not speak.
Your eyes reveal a reflection of the hurt I've seen countless times,
so out of pity, I'll conceal the suffering I can see in mine.

Monster, you have scarred my virtue more than I know how to describe,
but if you recall what you stole from me that night...
I hope the thoughts eat at you,
and rob you of your precious sleep - as they often do for me.

I hope your body goes numb,
upon realizing what I have become -
as a result of your guilty pleasures.

I can still feel your touch sometimes,
I kick with violence and desperation.
And I swear I still hear your whispers in the silence
"Go back to sleep."
Monster, I am much too weak.

the galaxy is melting.

How does it feel to know you're everything I need?
The butterflies in my stomach, they could bring me to my knees. 




Words are useless when this embrace is the only thing holding me together.
My breathing would be in vain if you did not offer such a dramatic change to the way I viewed the world.
I've learned to move forward, and forget about the hurt.
When I stare into your eyes, they break me down. 
The emotion within them feels like the only thing I cannot grasp.

Rediscovering Relient K was the best part of my daaaay.

We should get jerseys 'cause we make a good team
But yours would look better than mine, 'cause you're outta my league.
And I know that it's so cliche to tell you that everyday
I spend with you is the new best day of my life.
Everyone watching us just turns away with disgust.
It's jealously, they can see that we've got it going on.

And I'm racking my brain for a new improved way
to let you know you're more to me than what I know how to say.
You're okay with the way this is going to be,
this is going to be the best thing we've ever seen.

If anyone can make me a better person, you could.
All I gotta say is I must've done something good.
I came along one day and you rearranged my life,
All I gotta say is I must've done something right.
I must've done something right.

Maybe I'm just lucky, 'cause it's hard to believe
Believe that somebody like you'd end up with someone like me.
And I know that it's so cliche to talk about you this way
But I'll push all my inhibitions aside.
It's so very obvious to everyone watching us
That we have got something real good going on.

And I'm racking my brain for a new improved way
To let you know you're more to me than what I know how to say.
You're okay with the way this is going to be,
this is going to be the best thing we've ever seen.

If anyone can make me a better person, you could.
All I gotta say is I must've done something good.
I came along one day and you rearranged my life,
All I gotta say is I must've done something right.
I must've done something right.


♥